When you get divorced, it is going to affect virtually every aspect of your life, from your social circle to your job. More than anything, it’s going to affect your kids. There’s a likely chance that your kids are more perceptive than you think. They may not know the full extent of what’s happened, but they may have their suspicions. Many single parents may find it tough to reconnect with their kids after a divorce, but a Texas divorce lawyer can help you figure it out.
Co-Parenting Is Rarely Easy
When you are forced to endure a contested divorce, the relationship between you and your spouse at the end of it may be nonexistent, except as co-parents. Through it all, you should never forget that your kids are likely going to have the hardest time adjusting to a new normal they never asked for. Even if you and your spouse can’t stand being around each other, you need to, at least, feign civility for the sake of your kids if you are both awarded joint custody by the court.
It can be very difficult to cope with a divorce if it is contested, especially knowing that you will be forced to interact with your former spouse for the sake of your kids. Your kids may even start to sense that animosity and pull away, believing your current situation is somehow their fault. It’s up to you to prevent that from happening by connecting with your kids and being a consistent presence in their lives, despite the divorce.
The most important thing you can do in this situation is develop a parenting plan. Depending on the relationship between you and your former spouse, you can draft a parenting plan together that outlines a visitation schedule, child support, and more. Otherwise, the court will have to do it for you. Whatever you end up doing, you have to stick to this plan for your kids. It’s important for the court to see both of you doing what you can to be there for them.
You don’t want to try forcing the other parent out by bribing your kids, ignoring your spouse’s rules, and trying to be the “cool” parent. The court may see this as parental alienation, which can have a negative impact on the custody arrangement. You could even suffer additional penalties if the other parent can prove that you are doing it maliciously.
Tips for Reconnecting With Your Kids
To be sure your kids continue to be raised in a nurturing environment, you want to do whatever you can to respect the co-parenting schedule and be a good parent. Otherwise, you could risk alienating your kids and giving your spouse a reason to legally push you out of their lives. Children who realize they are in a broken home may develop emotional problems later in life. Your sole focus should be on raising your kids. Here are some steps you can take to do it right:
- Talk to your kids all the time. Your kids may be keeping a lot of their struggles to themselves. They may not fully understand what’s happening and are afraid to say something. Make sure your kids know they can always come to you with their problems. Be honest with them about what’s going on, listen to their concerns, and work together to come up with solutions, such as a consistent routine.
- Keep your expectations to a minimum. Things are not going to magically get better overnight. Rebuilding bonds after a divorce takes time and effort. You may have to let the situation proceed the way it will. Nevertheless, be a consistent presence in your kids’ lives, and let them know they can always talk to you. Build a routine, and stick with it. Don’t force it. It takes as long as it needs to take to reach a new normal.
FAQs
Q: Is Communication With Your Kids Important?
A: Communication is one of the most important elements of being a parent. You need to talk to your kids and listen to them when they have something to say. Communication is a vital part of building a solid basis of trust with your kids. If you ignore them or close yourself off, they are going to notice, and they may start to doubt you. They may act out just to get your attention.
Q: Can Infidelity Affect a Divorce in Texas?
A: Yes, infidelity can greatly affect a divorce in Texas. If one spouse can prove that infidelity was a contributing factor to the marriage, it can affect asset division, spousal support, and even child custody arrangements. Infidelity may be seen as a sign that the offender is not capable of maintaining a stable living environment for their child. The other parent might end up with sole custody.
Q: Is Parental Alienation a Crime?
A: No, parental alienation is not considered a crime. However, it can have serious consequences on child custody if one parent can prove that the other is trying to alienate their kids. Some important signs of parental alienation include your ex:
- Refusing to let you see your kid
- Making decisions without your involvement
- Lying to your child about how dangerous you are
Q: Which Parent Will Get Custody?
A: There is no way to automatically tell which parent will get custody in a Texas divorce. The court must determine whatever is right for the child. Mothers and fathers are considered equal parents in Texas. Ultimately, the court will choose whichever parent has the most stability, income, or love for the child. Generally, courts will go with joint custody to make sure both parents are equally responsible for their child.
Reach Out to a Lawyer Today
It can be difficult to establish a new normal for your children after a divorce. Still, it’s important that you make the effort to succeed. Your kids need stability, attention, and care from both you and your spouse if possible. A good lawyer can negotiate a solid parenting plan and custody arrangement.
Contact Stange Law Firm to schedule a consultation with a valued team member today.
